"Zeke"

I thought you might all enjoy a video of our newest little man. He was hanging out with me in my flat and enjoying some individual attention. This little guy is so good that he's been going out with me everywhere the last 2 weeks. What a sweetie!

Day 16

Day 16 - A Picture of someone who Inspires You
This is Katie. I've never met her, don't know her last name, but she is one of my best sources of inspiration and comfort while I'm here. Her blog : http://kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com/ came to my attention in a post at this website - http://www.incourage.me/

She is living in Uganda and gave up much more than me to do so - a large family, a serious boyfriend, civilisation... She has adopted or permanently fostered all of the girls in the photo above and her blog is wonderfully truthful about all the challenges that have come her way, but her faith never flags. She has created an entire ministry from nothing. Truly an amazing woman.

Day 15

Day 15 - A Picture of something You want to do before You Die

Hmm... what do I want to do before I die? I don't know that I have any big goals or experiences I want to accomplish. I guess there's always travelling - I'd like to see Australia and maybe somewhere in South America. They're more things that I'd just kind of be interested in though, not raging desires. I suppose that must mean that I live a pretty contented life. I tried to answer this question by asking myself what I would do if I had an unlimited supply of money and a few weeks off but I would probably just go home and get some proper American food! Which I've obviously already done, so it doesn't really fit the bill. So then I decided to turn to the internet for help. These are some of the things other people apparently want to do that I think would be cool:

Swim with a dolphin

Be an extra in a film

Ride a camel in the desert (maybe I really do want to do this - it's popped up twice now)

See the great wall of China (although I don't really want to see China itself)

Ooh! I finally found something I actually do really want to do before I die - ZORBING!
I'd forgotten about this but everytime I see it advertised I always think it looks awesome. So, this is my new life goal! :-)

Day 14

Day 14 - A Picture of Someone You could never Imagine Your Life without

Jesus is actually the ONLY person I can't imagine my life without. Moving countries all the time and running a baby home creates quite an active 'imagination' in this regard!

Day 13

Day 13 - A Picture of Your favorite Band or Artist

I don't really have a "favorite" per se. It depends on what mood I'm in. However, the lastest Casting Crowns cd, "Until the Whole World Hears" is probably one of the few that I can play on any day and still enjoy. Also Taylor Swift, but I couldn't quite bring myself to put a picture of her on the blog!

"Sun City" prison

The mom of one of my kids is in this "Centre of Excellence". I thought those of you who have heard me talk about going to visit might enjoy the following videos, showing what it looks like where we visit and also inside. Very little is provided for the prisoners and this mom gets very little support from her own family. We are often the only ones she has visiting for months, and the few things I bring with help her get through the months. This is my take on "I was in prison and you visited me". Have to say though, that it is not my favorite thing. The women's section is not as bad, but this prison has a terrible reputation for the abuse that goes on inside, and having met some of the guards, I can believe it is true. They are always very nice to me (a white lady looking after a stranger's black child seems to win some points) but they will openly admit to beating the prisoners, even when they believed I was a social worker! All in all, I will be trying to stay out of a South African jail.

Video of a poetry session that was held at "mom's" prison. You can see the gate where we go in and what it looks like from the outside.


Video of the inside of the prison out into the yard

Day 12

Day 12 - A Picture of something You Love or as a companion to yesterday's post, My 10 Favorite Things About South Africa


1) The Weather
Johannesburg has got the best weather. Since it is so far south, it doesn't have the crazy hot summers that one thinks of as "African" and since it is nonetheless in Africa, the winters aren't too cold. The rainy season is in summer (Dec - Feb) and by that time we're usually glad for some cooling showers. The rain rarely lasts more than an hour, although recently we've had some storms. And, after living in Scotland, I love the fact that it actually storms, with thunder and lightning, and even hail! No more drizzle for me. I'm occasionally amazed at the fact that I survived British weather so well - give me 3 cloudy days here and I get very moody. Also, with the constant sunshine I have one heck of a tan!

2) The immediacy of needs
Ok, obviously there are levels at which this becomes untrue. My only point is that it is nice on a personal level to be able to do something straightforward and really help someone. A loan, a generous tip, a 2L pop bottle filled with water for the trash collectors, some blankets for the kids in Vange's program, all these things can make a tangible difference in someone's life. It is a far cry from saving the world, and obviously it would be better if they didn't have the needs in the first place, but it is more immediately satisfying than trying to fix many of the needs in more prosperous countries.

3) Cheap Dinner!
One of the things I love about this country (and you'll sense a theme pretty soon) is how cheaply you can dine out. A nice dinner out will cost about R80, which is about $11 at the current exchange rate. A cheap one will cost $5, and that's a sit down meal. On the other hand, a Starbucks Chai Tea will is $4! Now you see why that's a really special treat.

4) My kids (I have no idea why that is underlined, or how to make it go away)
Obviously I had to list the kids, but it is actually appropriate as a "South African" thing. Firstly because we have the cutest kids of anywhere (ok, maybe I'm biased). And Secondly because you can't actually do what I do, this group foster home idea, in the US. Americans are more focused on individual foster families, which is great when it works but I don't think it's always the best idea. There is a lot more potential for abuse when you don't have 7 people looking over your shoulder all the time.

5) Basil
Basil (my car - long and very amusing story behind the name that I won't tell here) would no longer be running if he were a Minnesotan car. He's going on 20 years old this year and our winters would have killed him for sure. I love him for being so forgiving of my terrible manual driving, my tendency to bash parts of him, and being "cheap cheap" to repair!

6) Game parks
If there is one thing I really love about living here it is the opportunity to see and photograph so many awesome animals. My happy place is at our local game park (3hrs away), as long as it's winter so I don't have to load up on allergy tablets, sprays and drops first. Although I do like spring for this cool picture I got of the zebra giving me attitude in a field of wildflowers.

7)Cheap Movies (I told you there was a theme)
Going to the movies is probably my favorite "treat" here - once the lights go down you could be in a cinema anywhere in the world, and the stories transport you to all the places you want to be. Also, I love being the only one in the cinema to get the specifically American or British jokes. The best part is that on Tuesdays and Wednesdays, movies are half price at the 2 local cinemas. That means they are less than $3! And, I don't like South African popcorn (they make it plain and then have 'flavour shakers', such as fruit chutney and salt & vinegar) or their fountain drink selection, so I never splash out on snacks. All in all a very cheap night out!

8) Happiness
Ok, let me explain this one. I am not one of those people who thinks that poor people are necessarily happier or more joy-filled than the rest of us. Rather I think that, as a society, South Africa is much more hopeful than anywhere else I've lived (especially the UK!). Party down to the climate no doubt and also because Apartheid ended such a short time ago and already so many changes have come about. There are certainly nay-sayers and those who think the government is going about it the wrong way, but people really believe in their ability to change their position in life. Also, with the incessant greeting (one I should have included in yesterday's post) everyone is so polite!

9) Woolworths (especially the frikadels and marshmallow pies)
Woolworths (Marks and Spencer with a different name for those from the UK) is my favorite store for the simple reason that they give us free food every week. And being the Lunds or Byerlys of South Africa, it is NICE food! And sometimes they even throw in clothes!!

10) My electric blanket
This one also has a few caveats - the reason I love my electric blanket (and radiator for that matter) is that South Africans seem to be constantly surprised by the fact that it gets cold in the winter and have never designed their houses to keep all that cold outside. And, they have an obesssion with fresh air, meaning that even in the dead of winter the curtains and windows will be open! As a result, without any form of heating, the inside of your house is only a few degrees cooler than the outside. Because of this, there are few things more enjoyable than crawling into your pre-heated bed at the end of a long day, and few things worse than trying to crawl out of said bed into the frosty morning.

Day 11

Day 11 - A Picture of something You Hate. I'm going to change this to my 10 least favorite things about South Africa. Don't worry, the positive side is coming tomorrow. :-)


1) Car Guards
Everywhere you go in South Africa there are car guards. They stand in the parking lots and "help" you park, reverse, and put your shopping in the car, and expect you to tip them for it. Now I respect that these people have a right to earn a living, and I do tip them if they've been of actual help, but they are employed by the shopping center they work for and they annoy me to no end. I can park and reverse perfectly well all on my own, and, as a rule, they like to directly behind you so you can't see and worry about hitting them! And, if I could put the groceries into the cart, there is a good chance I can get them into my car.


2) Pap
Pap is the staple food of most South Africans, as the Northern Irish have their potatoes. It comes with nearly every meal (even breakfast). Resembling mashed potato in appearance, if not texture, it is made from boiling mealie-meal (flour made from maize) until it thickens. The texture is something like eating sand and, if left for an hour or more in the pot, it congeals into an impossible to remove plastic-like substance. Most of our volunteers don't mind it, and in truth, it isn't THAT horrible, but I really don't like it and won't eat it unless it would be rude not to do so. The aunties know that on the days they make pap I will be having bread with lunch.


3) Breakfast Foods
South Africa seems to have an obsession with eating things for breakfast that quickly become mushy, or which have the texture of beach sand. The few "american" breakfast cereals they do have are either so expensive or so cardboary that they don't quite seem like home. Breakfast which used to be my favorite meal of the day is no longer. However, they have recently brought out "honey cheerios" which are almost like honey-nut cheerios. I've been living off of them for about 6 months now!


4) Mopping
By now most people have heard my rant about mopping. South Africans are obsessed with things looking clean. And if you dare to walk across a newly mopped floor, well shame on you! Even if you're in a busy mall or airport and they've mopped the entire width of the floor. Surely you know how to levitate? Mopping takes precedence over all activities. When I was in the hospital with our kids, when the mopper came in, you had to get out, even if your child was upset. And finally, the moppers stand there with the yellow caution signs, which we would use to save us a lawsuit, and FAN the floor with them. As if it will suddenly become dry. During which time I am convinced they aim the things at your shins to disable you being able to walk across their fresh clean floors.


5) Disparate Education and Cultural Differences

A Private School Classroom

A Township Classroom

One of the residual effects of Apartheid is a highly distinct educational system among the rich and poor. The rich generally send their children to private schools, or at least live in an area where the government schools are respectable. During recent government teacher strikes, very few suburban schools were affected while schooling in the townships ground to a halt. Township children are crammed into classrooms, their teachers rarely bother showing up for class, and they are expected to do all their work at school because they cannot take their books home with them. During this recent strike children were expected to prepare for their most important exams alone, without books or teachers, and some that I know failed their grade because their teachers could not even be bothered administering the exams.

Additionally, the differing levels of education mean that what I would consider common knowledge is most definitely uncommon. Many things I take for granted, like knowing who Jane Austen and Charles Dickens are, understanding the concept of nutritional labels, or a basic knowledge of how your immune system functions, are completely foreign to the people I work with. Not because they are stupid, but because they were never taught. So I live on a balance of trying to help them understand without sounding condescending to a person 3x my age.


6) Walls, walls and more walls

Everywhere you look around in urban and suburban south africa you will find houses surrounded by walls. They offer security and comfort to the people inside, ensuring no one enters your property without permission and keeping your kids from contact with the outside world. Any yet, in every neighborhood there is one house open to the elements like an american house. Do they get robbed more frequently? I don't know. It baffles me how one family can think electric fencing is a necessity (I certainly like mine!) and other sleeps soundly with nothing but a pane of glass between them and the street.

Other than the security considerations, I find the walls to be a bit claustrophobic. You cannot see the horison, can't see any but the tallest parts of your neighbors buildings, and rarely see your neighbors at all!


7) Poverty
One of the hardest things for a foreigner to adjust to here is the relatively close juxtaposition of squalor and luxury. When you arrive you are shocked and condemn the wealthy for living their lives and leaving others to suffer, and yet quickly you become immune, helping where you can and ignoring the general plight of the people around you. I think the problem is just so big that you can only focus on the things you can help with and you have to try and forget the rest. But at the same time, if every one with extra would give to those without, it seems the country would improve. I see people living at the edge of poverty who will be more generous than those in the stratosphere.

But then comes the argument, and there is some truth to this, that you cannot simply "give" things to people - they need to be earning it. Much of the South African poor has an entitlement complex, strange as that may seem. They seem to think they deserve things, from the government because it was promised to them, such as houses, jobs, land. And from foreigners because they assume American accents come with American wealth. It is hard to know how to encourage independence without leaving people down in the filth.


8) BUGS!

Above and below a Parktown Prawn

South Africa has bigger bugs than anywhere I've ever seen. These beauties, confined to our area of Jo'burg, are called Parktown Prawns, named after the area they were discovered and their Prawn-like exoskeletons. They are scary both for their size, their ability to jump (in excess of a meter!) and the fact that they are nearly impossible to kill. "Considerable force" is needed to do them in - which is certainly quite considerable as I have seen one squashed with a brick and keep on jumping. Bug spray seems to do nothing to them, only aggravates them to release their second line of defense - a stink a skunk would be proud of. The most effective method I have found is to pour boiling water on them. However, this is obviously not practical in many situations.

9) SPIDERS!
Above is a rain spider, my least favorite african animal. They can grow up to 12" in diameter, and often can be found in homes during our rainy season (just typing this is causing me to grow twitchy and glance toward the roof). Once I had one in my car, crawling across the passenger seat headrest, straight at me. Probably my most terrified moment yet. I can't kill them, can't live with them, just sit watching them in terror until one of the aunties comes and kills it for me. Yech!


10) Being so far from home
Ok, when I lived in Scotland I was far too, but there it was only 14 hours away and 2 flights. Here, it can take upwards of 28 hours to travel between our two countries and costs an arm and a leg. I do feel a bit bad using a BA plane for this one though - they're my favorite part of the journey!

Day 10

Day 10 - A Picture of the Person You do the oddest things with



Definitely this one has to be Anna - the photo above is a case in point - we made an entire lego world with some donations the baby home received one Christmas. Anna gets me to do loads of things I'd never do otherwise - camping, dying my hair, roadtripping at the spur of the moment, eating food coloured pancakes.... We've had some great times and it keeps life super interesting!

In quietness and TRUST

Well, I wrote an incredibly long blog post last night, but then my internet cut out and it got lost somewhere in the ether. I won't tell you the whole story again, but the basic gist is that we are having what may be an incredibly stressful situation developing at the baby house surrounding the future of one of our little girls. Last night I was panicking and making contingency plans when suddenly I realised that it is not up to me to "save" her, but rather that I needed to trust that God would make his will for her life clear. This is not always easy for me as I can think of many times in the recent past that we have misunderstood, or simply not considered what His will might be, and He has not prevented us from making mistakes.

However, this is the same God who took care of Hagar and her dying son in the desert, asking why she was worried and promising to provide for them. If she had no reason to worry, then surely I, one of the "chosen" do not either. Also, it is repeated over and over how much God cares for the orphans - surely he loves her more than I ever could. So, I am trying to put my trust in God and take myself and my human efforts and prejudices out of the equation.

Photo Challenge Day 9

Day 09 - A Picture of the Person who has gotten You through the most

Sue-Ellen, one of my co-workers here, is definitely the answer to this question! The picture above is her and her 2 kids by our Christmas Tree this year. Sue is the youngest staff member, apart from me, so she's more of "my generation" and she's one of the most outspoken people I know. She and I are also the only 'unattached' members of the house and we enjoy moaning about the lack of men who want to take on your kids.

Sue's the one that I talk major decisions over with and confide in about my worries for the kids, the staff, the home... She knows all the latest news from the US and actually ASKS about my family!

Sue and her family are my "real" family here in SA, in the sense that I can call them for any help I need without feeling bad about it, because they'll do the same to me. Her dad was the one who came and sat at the baby home for an hour working on jump-starting my car when I came home from my last leave.

In QUIETNESS and trust...

Our lovely HR manager, possibly recognising the signs of an impending nervous collapse, gave me the week off. I'm not on "leave" so I'm still fielding e-mails and phone calls, but I took advantage of the fact that I'm off the schedule and have no clinic/court appointments to get away from the baby house for a few days. I found a retreat center just about an hour north of Jo'burg which is great. It's close enough that I can go home in the case of an emergency but far enough to feel like a holiday.

Two of the things I find subtly stressful about Jo'burg are the walled-in yards and the lack of water. After living in MN and on the North Sea, I'm used to seeing the horison and the smell of water. Neither are things that you consciously notice the lack of, but when you experience them again it's very refreshing. Especially the horison. I notice that I being to feel a little bit trapped when I've been in the city for too long.

Another funny reminder from the drive out here was how "African" South Africa really is. Sometimes living in Jo'burg you can feel like you're just in any other city (although the cultural differences jump out and surprise you) but driving out today I found a cow in the middle of the road, being herded by some adolescent boys.... not something you commonly see in Eagan, Minnesota! Also, within view of my retreat, I saw a man who was 'mowing' his lawn with a hand-scythe for the better part of the afternoon.

So far, I'm enjoying my break, although it is uncommonly quiet out here. Apparently I am the only guest, at least for tonight, so I suppose that's part of it. Also, it is just so far from traffic, and our street is quite busy well into the night. Anyway, I've decided I'll never make it on a "silent retreat" and have iTunes going in the background while I write this! Should it get to be too much I have my fan in the car for a little white noise.

Day 8 - the baby mop

Day 08 - A Picture that makes you Laugh


I think this is legendary! I kind of wish it were real too - it would deal with my least favorite chore in a jiffy! In case you can't read the writing, my favorite bit is : "There's no child exploitation involved. The kid is doing what he does best anyway - crawling. But with Baby Mops he's also learning responsibility and a healthy work ethic." - makes me laugh every time!

Day 07

Day 07 - A Picture of Your Childhood Crush


Yes, I know this is a picture of an animated fox, but it also answers the question. Robin Hood is, to this day, my ideal man. Devastatingly attractive accent, unswervingly loyal, handy to have around in a tight spot and generous with all he has. It doesn't get any better than this ladies!

Day 06 - A Picture of a Person You'd Love to Trade places with for a day


My friend Kim, who is working in Abu Dhabi. In addition to being awesome through it's Garfield connotations, it looks like an amazing place! However, the day would have to be when she's on holiday - I have no desire to teach anybody.

Day 05 - A Picture of Your Favorite Memory


This will have to do for a large number of memories, but my favorite memories are of special times spent cuddling my babies - especially the ones that have left.

Day 4

Day 03(4) - A Picture of the Cast from Your Favorite Show.
Bones is definitely the top of the list - this has been my favorite show for YEARS now!

Grey's Anatomy I got addicted to when I was living in the states, and then re-discovered this last month with Sue-Ellen.

7de Laan is my top South African show, both for the 'normalcy' of its plot, and the quality of its characters. And because once it is finished it is time for the kids to go to bed!

Day 3

I'm swapping days 3 and 4 - New Year's Eve just begs to be "my night", especially as tonight (New Year's Day) is going to see me going to bed early and that's about it!

So, Day 04 (3) - A Picture of Your Night



Natalie, Barry and I went to a 4GOD party for New Year's Eve 2010. We had a great time - swimming, 30 Seconds, Braai food and I even learned how to play poker. Above photo was taken at an opportune time, as I was raking in the chips. The tide unfortunately began to turn...


We also played a very violent game of Spoons, which my reflexes are just not quick enough for.


Natalie ringing in the New Year at the amazing snack table. We sang and prayed for the last 30 minutes of 2010, and then ATE!


Marc playing poker, but I think the shirt says it all - we only got home around 2:30am!!